Sadness

I would like to focus my energies today to talk about the one thing that has made utterly sad in the past few week or so - my makeup.

I have had a very serious and weird outbreak of acne in the past few weeks. Not the one or two pimples I get on a regular basis, but enough to practically cover my face. To the point where even my usually fairly unobservant brother made a comment about it when he saw me a few days ago. So I had to figure out what on earth was going on, and eventually realized it was because I changed the foundation I use recently.

One of my favourite brands of makeup - and one of only two or three brands I am willing to spend more than what drugstore brands would cost me - is Bobbi Brown. I was introduced to their products five years ago by my friend S, and use multiple products by them now (by which I mean two - eyeliner and hydrating cream -  because I use exactly three products every morning).

So, anyway, last year I was introduced to Maybelline's foundation stick, which was excellent because liquid foundation is not a friend to me or my clothes. And then a few months ago, I discovered Bobbi Brown has also introduced a line of foundation sticks. This was exciting, but also draining on the wallet, so I waited a while before I actually picked it up and started using it. And, as it now strikes me, promptly started getting a whole lot of pimples.

I switched back to Maybelline this weekend, and my face is already clearing up, so seemingly that was the issue. But this makes me sad, because now I have Bobbi Brown foundation sticks that I have paid good money for and can't use. And friends who have my skin tone live too far away for me to distribute.

So, yeah, this is what is making me sad currently. Nothing else. Definitely not any other events in the past 48 hours. Nope.

Where I add to the noise without saying anything at all

For everyone who is outraged that the video has been banned, I'd like to ask you: who's really watching the video? and gaining/learning anything from it?

For everyone who is outraged that the video was made and is being viewed, and creating a furore because things are so much worse elsewhere, I'd like to direct you what some people like to call the Sainath fallacy.

And for the record, no, I haven't watched it, I haven't read much about it, because I can't. I would if I could. But as I've said before, I can't anymore. I am so exhausted from the perpetual outrage and the never ending latest atrocity and the continual latest example of complete and utter misogyny that I just can't.

And I don't know what the solution is. All I know is I don't see one, at all.

The problem of choice...

Back in the good old Dark Ages, when I was a kid, if you felt like having a packet of chips, things were very simple. You either got the plain salted wafers, or you got the corrugated ones with masala. I never liked the latter, so for me good old Uncle Chips was just perfect.

Then came the wonderful era of privatisation and globalisation and what-not. Frito-Lays came in and squashed Uncle Chips right out of the market (I think they bought it and then squashed it, but I may be wrong on this one). And quite frankly, the initial offerings of Frito-Lays were nothing to write home about. Really.

Then came their American Onion and Cream flavour (or something of that sort; I can never remember the exact name) which I developed quite a fondness for, and is the flavour I always choose to have even today. They've introduced several other flavours since then, most of which I don't like. And they only came out with those corrugated-style chips, which are never nearly as nice as wafers.

Yesterday, we developed a craving for simple potato wafers. Not asking for much you would think. I headed to the market, but what do you know? Not one shop keeps ordinary wafers. You have onion and cream, tomato, masala, mint, even paneer tikka and chicken barbeque for crying out loud. But ordinary potato wafers are just about impossible to find in the market. Sheesh.

Where the...?

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the whole point of upgrading software is to get new features, not lose out on the ones I already have and like.

Everywhere I turn, however, just the opposite seems to be happening. Adobe Reader 8 took away the Insert Bookmarks option, the latest version of Windows Media Player doesn't seem to have auto playlists, Gmail won't let me use Page Up and Page Down while applying labels anymore, and for the life of me, I can't find the Set Language option in the latest version of Microsoft Word.

Sheesh.

Explain to me...!!!

So I have these friends who live kind of far, far away. Stingy soul that I am, the most effective way of keeping in touch with these wonderful individuals is the Internet. Unfortunately (for them, that is - I really couldn't give two hoots), these wonderful individuals have a very strange method of keeping in touch.

They come online everyday, open their email accounts, then - wait for it - open their orkut accounts to send me a scrap telling me how they have so much to tell me but are kind of busy so will email me later.

To add insult to injury, I am then expected to open my email account, see the extremely exciting notification about having received a scrap, open my orkut account, and then see that they don't have time to email me, but have time to open utterly useless accounts to inform me of that fact.

Now in the time they waste opening this second account, would it be too much to ask for to receive a simple email - even if it's just two lines long - telling me how they are and that they'll send me longer email when they're relatively free? Why waste my time just because they're so busy?!?

Now would someone explain the logic of this to me?

Epiphany - Part II

There are times, when you look around you and realize it's complete hypocrisy on your part to call yourself an idealist and wonder why things are the way they are, because the truth is, there's nothing you're doing to make things any better. Ranting about it on your blog doesn't really accomplish anything, now does it?

Today was one of those days for me. It wasn't some earth-shattering incident. It was a scene anyone on the roads of Delhi would have seen pretty much everyday of his or her life. Yet it suddenly drove home the fact that there is so much more misery in the world than I have ever experienced. And despite my opinions or cynicism or even ideas, there is nothing I have ever done in my entrie life that could possibly have helped to alleviate any of that misery. And that is what makes me a hypocrite.

There are also times, when no matter how much you love the people around you, you tend to wish they were a bit more on the same wavelength as you; that they would be a tad bit more accepting of the turmoil within you. I can almost predict what the comments for this entry are going to be like!

So yes, to answer a question asked in response to my previous post, it is one of those times.

Epiphany

I am an idiot.

I am incompetent and irresponsible.

I know nothing, I feel nothing, I deserve nothing.

I have no faith. In anything. Or anyone.

I'm clueless about my life.

I have no goals.

I don't see the point of anything.

I don't even know why I exist.