Or at least, things you hear when trying to celebrate Diwali at the workplace in Amreeka.
On the kurta with jeans look I sported at work on Chhoti Diwali:
On the kaju barfi I took to work, because I'm nice like that:
On the damn "omg photo of India from space on Diwali!!!" post that makes the rounds on Facebook every. single. year.:
On the gorgeous Fab India dupatta I wore, gifted to me by S:
On the kurta with jeans look I sported at work on Chhoti Diwali:
Colleague: That's an interesting combination of Indian and Western. Is that, umm, approved of in India?
Me: This is how I dressed pretty much every day in college.
Colleague: Really? Good for you!
On the kaju barfi I took to work, because I'm nice like that:
Whoa! What is that pretty silver thing on top? Isn't that, like, dangerous?
On the damn "omg photo of India from space on Diwali!!!" post that makes the rounds on Facebook every. single. year.:
Colleague 1: I love that photo! Why is it fake?
Colleague 2: Are you sure it's not real? I mean, you do have 1 billion people. It's possible!
Me: I'm pretty sure India doesn't even have enough electricity for that photo to be real.
Colleague 1: But it's always the Indians who post that photo.
Me: Yes, well, some Indians are idiots.
On the gorgeous Fab India dupatta I wore, gifted to me by S:
I'm beginning to realise your claims about your extensive and wonderful dupatta collection are not false.